RYC Word Part 1: Seek, And You Will Find (Humility)
Dear Surrey Two,
At the last Chapter Assembly (this was the one before RYCon because it is now clearly after RYC and this post was saved as a draft for too long), we introduced the Litany of Humility. If you competed for RYC this year, it's likely that you had it as part of your fast. So, if you haven't already guessed, one of the main things we wanted you to take into and out of RYC this year is humility. I praise the Lord as this seems to have spread well throughout the chapter over the last month!
The Archdiocesan theme for the 2013-14 school year is "Walk Humbly with Our Lord". Uncoincidentally (through His grace), our spring camp took on a similar theme, with it's anchor verse being, "All who exalt themselves will be humbled and all who humble themselves will be exalted" (Matthew 23:12). And if you didn't already know, my counterpart is one of the humblest people you could meet not only in this community, but in your lifetime.
With all these big yet subtle hints, it was clear what the Lord wanted for the chapter.
Even more so, it was clear what the Lord wanted from me.
I get nervous easily. Really easily. I get shy and scared and it tends to take a lot for me to put myself in an environment where I feel uncomfortable: environments where I don't know people well and more so where I don't know what I'm doing. But as always, the Lord was calling me to do something greater for Him.
"Step out of your comfort zone," He told me. "Find new ways to humble yourself. New ways to seek, to find and to glorify Me."
And so with that, I joined Sr. Band and Sr. Dance.
I wrote about talents on another blog last year, and concluded the post with this:
With all these big yet subtle hints, it was clear what the Lord wanted for the chapter.
Even more so, it was clear what the Lord wanted from me.
I get nervous easily. Really easily. I get shy and scared and it tends to take a lot for me to put myself in an environment where I feel uncomfortable: environments where I don't know people well and more so where I don't know what I'm doing. But as always, the Lord was calling me to do something greater for Him.
"Step out of your comfort zone," He told me. "Find new ways to humble yourself. New ways to seek, to find and to glorify Me."
And so with that, I joined Sr. Band and Sr. Dance.
I wrote about talents on another blog last year, and concluded the post with this:
"We are ungrateful and nervous that the rawness of our gifts will bring us unwanted distress and embarrassment. But where's the fun in that? The pursuit of a talent is beyond rewarding in so many ways. Better yet, it can become one of the greatest ways we can bring glory to the Father if only we permit them to do so."
(Dangit, past Angelica. Why you gotta challenge me like that?)
Sr. Band terrified me because everyone knew what they were doing, but I didn't. I played bass for a friend's debut in December, but even then I didn't know what notes I was playing. So though it was my first time playing, I'm not sure it really counts as much. This time around I got my brother to teach me how to play and practiced as much as I could. And strangely enough, the actual practices scared me more than performing on stage.
Sr. Dance was more frightening than Sr. Band. I joined Sr. Dance this year for the same reasons that I did the last: to exemplify that Philippians 4:13 is a verse to let resonate within you. I am extremely self-conscious about dancing. Unfortunately this feeling was placed within me a long time ago by someone who told me I wasn't very good at dancing. And since I was a lot younger at the time, it stuck with me. And it sucked because I knew better, but that one comment seemed to outweigh all the positive ones I had received. So I figured, what better way to try again, than to try for God? No one was waiting for me to prove myself, so rather than stepping out of my comfort zone to prove nothing to nobody, I decided to step out of it to love the Lord.
Though my anxiety boiled with each step that brought me closer to the stage, tracing the sign of Victory across my torso cooled me down like no other. Each performance was a prayer from a weak servant to the Mighty King of Strength. I brought, gave, and left my all on stage because He deserved to receive it. And by satisfying Him, I was satisfied in turn. I left my performances with no regrets or feelings of embarrassment, because everything I did was for Him alone. So when it was announced that Surrey 2 had won both competitions, I rejoiced not because we won, but because He did. He won my trust, my pride, my patience, and my heart. And that's all that mattered, because a victory is only a real victory if it is shared with Him.
Sr. Band terrified me because everyone knew what they were doing, but I didn't. I played bass for a friend's debut in December, but even then I didn't know what notes I was playing. So though it was my first time playing, I'm not sure it really counts as much. This time around I got my brother to teach me how to play and practiced as much as I could. And strangely enough, the actual practices scared me more than performing on stage.
Sr. Dance was more frightening than Sr. Band. I joined Sr. Dance this year for the same reasons that I did the last: to exemplify that Philippians 4:13 is a verse to let resonate within you. I am extremely self-conscious about dancing. Unfortunately this feeling was placed within me a long time ago by someone who told me I wasn't very good at dancing. And since I was a lot younger at the time, it stuck with me. And it sucked because I knew better, but that one comment seemed to outweigh all the positive ones I had received. So I figured, what better way to try again, than to try for God? No one was waiting for me to prove myself, so rather than stepping out of my comfort zone to prove nothing to nobody, I decided to step out of it to love the Lord.
Though my anxiety boiled with each step that brought me closer to the stage, tracing the sign of Victory across my torso cooled me down like no other. Each performance was a prayer from a weak servant to the Mighty King of Strength. I brought, gave, and left my all on stage because He deserved to receive it. And by satisfying Him, I was satisfied in turn. I left my performances with no regrets or feelings of embarrassment, because everything I did was for Him alone. So when it was announced that Surrey 2 had won both competitions, I rejoiced not because we won, but because He did. He won my trust, my pride, my patience, and my heart. And that's all that mattered, because a victory is only a real victory if it is shared with Him.
Ad Majorem Dei Gloriam
For the Greater Glory of God
O Jesus! meek and humble of heart, Hear me.
From the desire of being esteemed,
Deliver me, Jesus. (repeat after each line)
From the desire of being loved,
From the desire of being extolled,
From the desire of being honored,
From the desire of being praised,
From the desire of being preferred to others,
From the desire of being consulted,
From the desire of being approved,
From the fear of being humiliated,
From the fear of being despised,
From the fear of suffering rebukes,
From the fear of being calumniated,
From the fear of being forgotten,
From the fear of being ridiculed,
From the fear of being wronged,
From the fear of being suspected,
That others may be loved more than I,
Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it. (repeat after each line)
That others may be esteemed more than I ,
That, in the opinion of the world,
others may increase and I may decrease,
That others may be chosen and I set aside,
That others may be praised and I unnoticed,
That others may be preferred to me in everything,
That others may become holier than I, provided that I may become as holy as I should,
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