Forgive and

Dear Surrey Two,

Forgive and forget: a phrase that gets thrown around a lot. Forgive someone who's hurt you, and forget that it happened.

Forgive and forget.

Forgive and get.

Get frustrated,

get annoyed,

get disappointed.

Because you feel like you're the only one trying. The only one making an effort to change. The only one who still gets hurt. Damaged, bruised, broken. How can we forgive if we can't forget the pain?

I was reflecting on a past bruise while before the Lord recently when a different phrase popped into my head:

Forgive and give.

Give your care,

give your love,

give yourself.

Because how can we fully forgive if we don't give ourselves to the receiver? Forgiveness requires humility, and if a Mighty King who is consistently hurt by our poor choices is able to forgive us sinful humans, then why can't we swallow our pride and forgive one another? Time and time again, He is hurt, and forgives. But after being hurt only once or twice, we harden our hearts.

We bottle it up, pushing others away and remain closed off.
He seeks to console us, calling us to draw near with open arms.

Two weeks ago while I was in deep sadness, a dear sister told me to pray for the people who I felt hurt by. Though praying for your "prosecutors" may not be new advice to any of us, what followed her suggestion was new to me.

"Pray for them because you can't feel bitterness towards someone you pray for."

And it's true. We can't feel bitterness towards these people because we want what's best for them. And if we're praying for them, it's because we want to love them. Bitterness and pain is inevitable at first, but over time I am confident that a bitter heart will be replaced by Christ's heart through prayer.

So let's forgive and give. Give our time, give our care, give our love, and give our prayers. Let us give ourselves, because although we may not receive anything "good" from those who hurt us, our "reward is great in heaven" (Matthew 5:12).

Bear with one another and, if anyone has a complaint against another, forgive each other; just as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. (Colossians 3:13-14 NRSVCE)